I was out to coffee recently with a colleague I hadn’t seen in quite a while, and he mentioned a seriously attractive job opportunity that he was presented with at his previous employer. He’d been given ‘the heads up’ about this role and was asked to start putting a submission together for it. It was a group management position. He was basically being handed the position. Being a role that was quite sort after, and one that he’d dreamt of for some time, he was naturally excited and very enthusiastic about it all… then things went quiet. You’ll know what happened next. A week after the initial ‘heads up’ he went back to the general manager and sought a progress update. Things had gone quiet for a reason; the group manager position had gone to another candidate external to the company. My colleague was livid.

There aren’t many more de-motivating things than a promise not delivered. The old-fashioned term “Indian-giver”[1] comes to mind. The term describes someone who gives you something only to request it back later. Only a slight deviation from this is someone who promises something only to re-neg later. It’s potentially devastating for the person missing out.

It highlights a point in human behaviour though. When we think about it, we can easily predict how successful our proposals might be by the energy with which they’re received. Get a lukewarm response to anything you’re trying, and you guessed it, best be prepared to be disappointed.

There’s nothing wrong with getting bad news. Job knock-backs, presentations that don’t hit the mark, and products that simply don’t sell… it’s all about being realistic regarding the odds. I’ve mentioned about being ‘pessimistically optimistic’ before. Don’t get your hopes up and remain ’surprizable.’ This way you can remain positive and upbeat in the worst of circumstances and at least when things go quiet.